Grange Notes by Tim Swartz, Grange President (with everyone’s help), October 5, 2020
What does it take to stand up to bad behavior?
Using her own experiments and those of other psychologists, she has identified several factors that can get in the way of doing the right thing:
- Ambiguity: Not knowing just what you should do–which can also be strongly influenced by the inaction of those around you.
- Who is responsible?: Especially in crowd situations, it’s easier to wait for someone “official” to take the lead, someone who supposedly knows the right thing to do.
- Considerable costs: There can be significant (non-monetary) costs that can hold you back–including safety fears, consequences for your professional status, and rejection by your social group.
- Training and practice: Various groups put on role-playing training in ways to speak up in difficult situations, like objecting to people telling racially insensitive jokes. Trying out hard conversations in supportive groups gets us used to speaking up. Here in central VT, SURJ (Showing Up for Racial Justice is one such group.
- Foster empathy: Learning about the real costs to persecuted groups can make you appreciate how much smaller the risk of speaking up is, compared to the harm that may be allowed to happen. Catherine cited the famous poem by Pastor Martin Niemoller starting “First they came…” as an object lesson (follow the link to learn more).
- Ethical leaders: When it’s appropriate, bring in people in your community–or in the wider social world–who are leaders of a team, a community, or other social group. In some cases, they who can influence others who may not listen to you. Sometimes it takes someone who is already an acknowledged authority to change someone else’s mind.
- Find a friend: fostering a social group that supports one another in the importance of speaking up for social justice, or other causes will help you understand you are not alone.
- Change the culture: This is the ultimate goal–and these changes can happen quickly, even starting with a small group. Humans are strongly influenced by the attitudes they perceive around them–Catharine used the example of campaigns that say “most of your neighbors vote”, rather than saying “it’s your civic duty to vote”. The much larger influence of the former approach has been well-researched!
And watch for the next Grange Program, on Dec. 5th–we’ll send out word about the next interesting speaker presented by Grange Lecturer Carl Etnier!
Kids Trade & Play: This Saturday! Sign up for your “shopping” slot!
We will have windows open in the basement, and recommend that shoppers who come wear a sweater or coat–we need to keep fresh air moving to reduce the chances of the virus hanging around. Please send just one shopper per family if possible, to reduce congestion!
Last month, we were able to serve about 40 people, if people sign up for all the slots we can at least repeat that–we know this is a great part of the support system that families need in these hard times. The organizers ask for a suggested donation of $3.00 per family, but no one will be turned away! There are many bins of clothing & shoes for every size from infant to Junior 12 waiting for you to select your favorites.
We will accept clothes donations on Saturday, but Erin says please refrain from bringing toys and gear this month–we are overloaded, and want to focus on the warm clothing that families need for the cold weather. You can contact Erin, learn about the loyal crew of volunteers who work with her, and the exchange in general on their Facebook page.
Auction closes–memories shared and money raised
Only one skirt and one T-shirt remained un-bid-on at the end, and satisfied customers came and picked up all the items on which they posted winning bids this last Saturday. If anyone wants the last couple of items (see below), offer a donation, and we’ll see if we can make an arrangement!
Many thanks yet again to the many people who worked to get this together, especially lead auctioneers Elizabeth Templeton and Ruth Ruttenberg, who managed the website postings and the distribution from the Grange Old Entrance porch. Ruth is completing the accounting and division of the proceeds, deducting website, Paypal and credit card fees. The funds raised will be a big help for the 2 organizations for which Marj put in so many volunteer hours and her boundless energy over the years. Equally important is the sharing of our memories of working with, dancing with and being inspired by Marj–and getting Marj’s dance skirts into the hands of people who will make sure her memory will be back on the dance floor as soon as it is safe!